Back in the Swedenland

The flights home turned out to be boringly unproblematic and I have now been home in Stockholm safe and sound for the past few days. I managed to get a week and half more off work, which I will use to get back into the Swedish way of life. I've tried getting as much done as possible since getting back, drinking loads of water straight from the tap, eating decent burgers, pizza, chips and kebabs... you know Swedish food. Otherwise things are pretty much the same as when I left Stockholm allthough the sun has had his hat on quite a bit, which is nice of him. I can tell you all that I successfully managed to get a grand total of zero checks off the checklist which I made at the beginning of the trip. Also for all of you modern cats out there who have a facebook account, you will notice I have uploaded pictures from the end of my trip (Laos, Vietnam, Cambodia and Bangkok) taken with my new camera which I bought in Bangkok, but didn’t want mention on here due to high jinxing-factor. And I think that’s about all for this time… Thank you all for reading and I look forward to seeing you all on here for my next trip, which looks certain to be Africa in less than a years time if all goes to plan. Take Care!

ONE last night in Bangkok

Sihanoukville would have been the perfect ending to a perfect trip, had it not been for my usual naivety which always seems to hit me towards the end of my trips. The brutal trio of sand, strong breeze and sun (or Earth, Wind and Fire if you wish) burnt my face pretty badly, leaving my face in blisters and peeling tan. Apart from this mishap Sihanoukville was brilliant with good weather and a great nightlife. I stayed by the beach for four nights before heading in a western direction, where i decided to jump off in the small town of Koh Kong close to the Thai border. Here I got Suka, a local motorcycle driver to drive me around to all the surrounding natural beauties including some impressive waterfalls, beaches and big mangrove swamps. The morning after Suka's brother took me to the border which I crossed by foot, then found a white van man who drove me to a town called Trat where I caught a bus to Bangkok. Getting off the bus I got stopped by police who searched through my entire luggage for drugs (they didn't find my massive supply of heroine) and then got stuck for an hour on motorbike in the horrendous Bangkok-traffic. After this my bum was rather sore (no the police didn't harm me) but I met up Josh again and also Isabelle and Marcus who missed their flight a few days ago (I think to be able to meet me.) We spent one night in Bangkok making the world our oyster for the last time in quite some while I suspect. Now I've been walking around the Khao San Road area with the boys who are curing their hangovers, until Josh and I have to catch our flight at half past eight tonight. So with any luck I should be back home in Stockholm by sunday morning (I can't tell you what time as this would create a mass hysteria of mobs of waiting fans at the airport) but I can tell you that Sunday night will be a great night to be out and about in the capital of Scandinavia.

Cambodyeah

Crossing the Vietnam border in this direction was completely hassle-free, you literally feel the change of people's attitudes as you cross, seven hours by bus from Saigon took me to Phnom Penh. The weather was gorgeous for the entire busride but as the doors opened so did the skies. So there I stood, on the "wrong" side of town in a monsoon/typhoon/windy rainy storm, trying to get a ride to the "right" side. When the thunder and lightning persisted a tuktuk driver drove me through the flooded roads lined with huge fallen trees and bent roadsigns. During my previous stay in Phnom Penh I stayed lake-side so I decided to vary my trips and chose the other tourist option of river-side (allthough in these conditions the whole of Phnom Penh seemed to be riverside.) I did my usual hectic sightseeing, walking around markets checking genocide-museums and visited a barbershop (I say barbershop, in truth it was just a random man in the street who happened to own the combination of a chair, a mirror and a hair clipper.) He cut my hair very short, but at the price of less than a dollar I can't really complain. Out of my two hectic stays in this capital city I must say I preferred staying lakeside, but Phnom Penh on both occasions was great. Now however I have reached a new town after almost 5 hours on a bus showing a Cambodian singing stand-up routine where both the male and female character sounded like Janice from "Friends," it did have the entire bus in fits of laughter though, kids standing on their seats, hard of hearing grandmothers having the jokes retold, so they must be doing something right. The town I've reached now, on my speed-dating tour of South-East Asia, is the beachside town of Sihanoukville, where (fingers crossed) there wont be any monsoon or Blackpool brothers, so I that I can return to Sweden with a somewhat respectable tan.

Saigon With The Wind

Nha Trang was supposed to be a few relaxed days on the beach, but then along came my temporary room-mate Aaron and his brother Dean, both from Blackpool, and introduced me to Northern English drinking-sessions (or just a "Sesh" for short.) A few days on the beach, quickly turned into six days on the bottle. I managed to make it to the beach once in these six days despite the weather being wonderful, the rest of the time was spent booze-cruising or just simply the same without the cruise, not that I'm complaining as we had a top, mad, sound crack of a time. However the prolonged "seshing " meant that I had to skip Mui Ne with its beaches and sand dunes which are supposed to be stunning. Instead I caught a 12 hour bus straight to Saigon (Ho Chi Minh City) which is an absolutely crazy city, it doesn't have anywhere near the same beauty as for example Hoi An or the charm of Hanoi, yet somehow it has something very appealing. During my 24 hours here so far I've tried to cram in as much as possible, visiting war-museums and historic places, but mostly just soaking up the chaotic atmosphere. The amount of two-wheeled motorised vehicles in Saigon is indescribable, it has a human population of about 5.5 million and a motorcycle population of about 3.5 million, thus crowding every street crossing and alleyway with hundreds of bikes. Strangely though it is never difficult to get through the traffic as a pedestrian, you just step out onto the road, walk normally and as if by magic (or religion, your choice) the sea of "motobikes" just parts around you, it's so easy it could probably be done blindfolded, but as my trip is nearing it's end without major incidents I won't risk it. I've had a great time in Nam, even though due to dishonest people, like a midget in a urinal, you constantly have to stay on your toes (believe it or not though I have met some friendly souls in Saigon) but my permitted stay runs out tomorrow, so I've decided to catch a bus from here to the Cambodian capital of Phnom Penh, and from there we'll see what happens...

Stressing Down The Coast Of Vietnam

I guess the title pretty much gives this latest installment of the blog away. Since writing last I've crossed the 17th parallel and gone through the Demilitarised Zone from the Vietnam (or as they refer to it here, American) war and visited UNESCO sights four and five since leaving India, in the form of the two historic towns Hue and Hoi An. Both places were interesting, however Hoi An is one of the prettiest towns I've ever seen (albeit commercial.) Set on the banks of the small river Thu Bon is the ancient port known by western traders back in the days as Faifo. I was lucky to arrive here on the 14th day of the lunar month, which only happens to be "Hoi An Legendary Night" filling the streets with people, candles and small bonfires. Coloured rice-lanterns illuminate the narrow alleyways full of tailors (there are more than 200 tailor shops in this town with a population of 70 000) craftsmen and artists selling everything from traditional rice-hats and cheap tailor made suits to giant wooden Buddha statues (luckily my bag is too full to buy any of their souvenir crap.) However both towns got only 24 hours each of my attention as I must rush to see everything, I have now returned to Beach-Life and hope to spend a few days on the beaches of Nha Trang, weather lately has been quite miserable but hopefully it will take a turn for the better soon.

'Namazeing

(Note the title is a play on not only two but three words!) After the very hectic travelling the past few days, I felt I deserved some relaxation, so I tagged along with the four Brits I met at the Laos/Vietnam border and their two friends Vickie and Louis to the UNESCO sight (third in three weeks) of Halong Bay. The place is absolutly amazing with an archipelago consisting of more than 3000 vertical limestone islands, which mysteriously rise up from the turquoise Gulf of Tonkin, unfortunatly the bay is clogged up with about as many touristboats as there are islands. We chugged around the bay during the day stopping off at caves (which were jam-packed with tourists and tackily lit with coloured halogen lights.) Then when the sun started to go down, many of the boats went back to the mainland giving the bay back it's natural beauty. We spent the evening Kayaking into the sunset then relaxed on the boat all night drinking beer and playing cards before catching some much needed sleep on the boat. The morning after we headed back cruising between the rocky isles and heavy fog (adding even more mystique to the location) before catching a bus back to Hanoi. In Hanoi I've mostly just wandered around and I really love the town, allthough Vietnamese people are without a doubt the rudest and unfriendliest people I've ever encountered (however I haven't been to Russia yet.) Usually I have quite a good sense of direction but in Hanoi it's just impossible to walk anywhere without getting lost. I think it's the combination of thousands of small streets which change name and curve without logic, the unhelpful locals who don't speak very much English and the fact that my Vietnamese isn't quite what it used to be which make this maze of a city so difficult to navigate and every stroll an adventure, but this may be what I like so much about Hanoi the sense of satisfaction and relief when you actually get through the chaos to where you want. Now though I have to hurry on south through the country to have time to see as much as possible, my nightbus takes me on a 14 hour trip to Hue tonight where I'll see what else "Nam" has to offer.

Hanoiing

It's too difficult to summarise the past few days, but I'll give it a shot. Where to start? The hours since my last post have been very hectic, I can tell you all I did cross the border on my second try allthough it wasn't the smoothest of transitions. On the Laos-side of the border I met four Brits (Alex, Jack, Jamie and George) so together with the two people I met the day before there were 7 of us using this complicated border. We managed to get a bus which was supposed to take us to Hanoi, but we realised these guys were very dodgy (they all had leatherjackets for one) and decided to jump ship earlier on in Thanh Hoa, and not pay what we had agreed. This of course caused havoc in the small town, and we were stalked by probably the entire population, until we managed to shake them off and find refuge at the trainstation. The train didn't leave until almost midnight and reached Hanoi about four hours later, here me and the Brits decided checking in to a hotel was not needed and decided to find a bar or someplace to sit instead until we could get a trip to the nearby Halong Bay. And that is pretty much where I am now, sitting at an internet place in Hanoi, waiting to see what happens today. Whatever happens later on in my life, I doubt I will live to see much more epic and hectic birthdays. Allright, now I've got five minutes to pack my bag before we apparantly leave for Halong Bay...

April Fool!

So first things first: Luang Prabang turned out to be a really nice town, very clean, friendly people allthough the whole place felt a bit artificial where every shop, hotel and restaurant had signs made by the same company and nothing really seemed genuine. The weather didn’t treat us too well but we did manage to get one nice day out by some wonderful waterfalls. After our time in the UNESCO listed town, Josh and I had different plans for our trip so we decided to both go at it alone for a while, Josh traveling to southern Laos whilst I would travel north to eventually reach Vietnam. The solo travel on my part started at 07.30 AM with a 16 hour ride in a minibus. This turned out to become the bumpiest ride I’ve ever experienced, and the bumps made everything from sleeping to reading and even drinking water impossible. Also the loud South-East Asian pop music and loud South-East Asian women throwing up didn’t make any of this easier. The minibus had seats for 11 but at one point we were 19 human-beings, 1 pig and several chickens crammed onto the vehicle (luckily the non human beings traveled on the roof after some discussion.) After 16 sleepless hours we reached Sam Neua and I decided to check into a guesthouse to catch 4 hours sleep before heading back to the bus station to catch a sawngthaew (glorified pickup-truck) for three and a half hours to get to the Vietnam border, this ride was free of live-stock but I’m pretty sure the stuff being transported in plastic sacks was alive at one point but had now been dead for at least a week. When I got there I would find out whether or not my gamble had worked out, the previous 28 hour journey could all be in vain as I had not yet acquired a visa, but I had heard rumours that Scandinavian citizens do not need visas to enter Vietnam. Luckily this was rumour turned out to be true… however I did not have a ticket out of Vietnam so I was denied access to the country, despite desperate attempts to convince bordercontrol. My only choice now was to head back, not the whole 28 hours but back to Sam Neua. At the border I met fellow Swede Anders and the Danish Josefine who both had the same problem, so we have now arrived at an internetplace and are scheming on an escaperoute out of Laos...

You Tube?

Josh and I decided that one night in Vientiane was enough, there was nothing wrong with the town itself, however we feel time is running out and there wasn't really that much more to see. So we took a 5 hour local bus trip off the beaten track, through stunning landscapes and decided to get off in the rural, isolated village of Vang Vieng. Vang Vieng is settled beautifully on the shores of the Nam Sang river with steep limestone mountains shielding it from all sides. I'm not sure if the villagers have seen white people before, but I'm pretty sure not many westerners have made it here before us. Note For all you old farts and/or readers not familiar with the South-East Asian travel route, everything written above is complete bull-shit (sorry Michael couldn't find the asterisk on this keyboard.) Vang Vieng happens to be one of the most popular stops for backpackers and this track is more beaten than Rihanna after a drunken night out with Chris Brown (even after 3 months in Asia, I keep up with the gossip.) "So what does this village have to offer?" I hear you ask. Well their concept is pretty much: Inner-tube of a tractor's tyre + river + copious amounts of alcohol and drugs = the biggest tourist attraction since bread came sliced! (Which is sad because the bread slicing tourism industry in Indochina has plummeted since the introduction of the tube.) We tried the infamous tubing the other day to see what all the hubub was about, and to be honest it was actually rather pleasant. You get dropped off a few kilometers up the river, then you just sit in the tube, slowly drifting downstream, getting pulled into bars, jumping from rope-swings and just relaxing, then 7 hours and about 20 bars later, you arrive back at the same place as you started, one word for you my friends: Genius! If your cup of tea involves drugs I'm pretty sure you can get that here as well, which becomes quite obvious at night, when all the young "tubed out" backpackers lie on mattresses in the T.V-Bars, laughing at endless reruns of "Friends" whilst sipping on dubious milkshakes. As I own the complete DVD box-set of "Friends" it felt rather pointless to stay very long, so after two nights a 6 hour journey by bus northward, once again through incredible mountainous scenery, took us to the Unesco Heritage listed site of Luang Prabang. We haven't been here very long, but what I've seen so far, I like and next time I write I hope to use many superlatives.

Laosy

So after two weeks in Thailand we finally managed to get our bums on a bus up north to the bordering country of Laos. The busride took us roughly 14 hours but after our trips in India this felt like a piece of cake. We arrived this morning in the capital of Laos, Vientiane, which seems to be a nice quiet town, allthough it's quite early and we haven't had time to look around too much. It's funny though that you notice directly when you arrive in a former french colony as all the streetnames begin with "Rue" and you get croissants, baguettes and "La Vache Qui Rit" cheese shoved in your face before you have time to say "fromage." We found a guesthouse just recently, very cheap and conveniently located between "The Scandinavian Bakery" and "The Swedish Pizza and Baking House." I can also confirm that our trip home has been postponed and we will now arrive early morning in Stockholm on the 25th of April, so you have plenty of time to organise the homecoming celebrations at Arlanda Airport. Finally I'd like to end on a sad note... I know how you have all taken to one (or rather two) of the major characters in this blog, my black Havaiana flip-flops, but I can sadly say that despite the work of brave Anthony in Fort Cochin, they did not survive the entire trip. Last week the stitching snapped and I felt it was time to say goodbye so I bought an identical pair and hopefully they will last me for many journeys to come. Rest in Peace!

Wasting Time?

Like Otis Redding sang, wasting time doesn't have to be a bad thing but at the moment it is exactly what we're doing. We've been back and forth to Bangkok now a few times, taking a daytrip to the old capital of Thailand, Ayutthaya,(I understand why they changed the capital, Bangkok is so much more modern with skyscrapers everywhere and Skytrains, whilst Ayutthaya is basically a pile of ruined temples...) after that we took a midweek break to the nearby island of Koh Samet. Our plan was to improve our tans but as it rained most of the time we ended up consuming alcohol throughout the four day stay. Apart from the weather Koh Samet was really nice allthough the spoken language seemed to be mostly Swedish and we also managed to eat way too much Swedish food. Whilst in Bangkok we've spent quite alot of Baht and not really seen much apart from two terrible football games, which have got me thinking maybe I have to go back to India to get United back on the right track... Within a near future though I think we will have crossed the border in the north, hopefully reaching Laos, but we'll see how that goes... Until then...

Title Tributed to Two Sisters!

So two months just flew right by, and our tour of India is now officially over. India was amazing and I know that I have to go back at some time in my life to finish up what I couldn't manage this time around. The Indian heat was unbelievable, making me reach levels of perspiration I thought only possible at double my age and four times my weight. My addiction to "snus" has been replaced by an addiction to "Chaini Khaini" which is the Indian equivalent to snus in smaller sachets but I guess they pack a much more lethal punch, as they can sometimes leave me with blistering gums, I Like! The smells in India are a constant factor, mostly ranging between shit and shit which has been lit on fire, but it's not as bad as it sounds and I think I will actually miss them. Pondecherry was a really nice town but more surprisingly so was Calcutta. The 34 hour trip from south to north (bus and train) didn't cause much trouble as I slept through much of it. However we did get one pleasant surprise as Miriam and Isabelle managed to get tickets on the same train as us and thus our farewell was once again postponed. By coincidence we arrived in Calcutta on the second and final day of the holy festival "Holi." I don't really know what significance the festival has but it does give the locals an excuse to get hammered and cover eachother with different coulored paints, we all managed to turn the coulor pink for the day (and partly the day after as it prooved quite difficult to get the paint out of your skin and hair.) We strolled around Calcutta for two days, seeing some touristy bits like the Victoria Memorial and Mother Teresas so called motherhouse and even managed to get the first real rain in over two months when the skies opened producing a surreal lightning show. But as it goes all good things must come to an end, and on Thursday night we eventually said our goodbyes to the two fantastic sisters who have accompanied us since Palolem, without whom I can't imagine how the trip would have gone but I can guarantee you it wouldn't have gone down this well. So now it's just the two of us, back on Khao San Road in Bangkok, which is still as chaotic, but it's nice to know that some things don't change. Marcus and Isabelle (devoted readers may remember these characters from my last epic travels in Siam, female character not to be confused with the younger sister whom I just met recently in India) are on their way north from Phuket to Bangkok as we speak, and it will be nice to meet familliar faces which we haven't seen since 2008.

Rockbottom

The title this time is not as depressing as it might sound, just a way for me to tell you all that after spending two weeks in Varkala we have now reached the southern most tip of India and are now heading north again. The town on the south cape is called Kunyakumari (or Cape Comorin) and can't boast with many things except for being the most southern point in India. 400 metres off the coast we visited the Indian equivalent of "The Statue Of Liberty." Located on a small island is a 40.5 metre (or 133 foot, you can google the reason why if you're interested as I can't be bothered telling you the dull story) tall statue of one of Indias most famous poets called... beats me... and it dates back all the way to the year 2000!!! Its amazing to think that I was only 14 years old when it was erected, the world can be mindboggling and really makes you feel small some times doesn't it! In Kunyakumari we also visited India's first (and as we speak only) wax-museum. It doesn't quite reach the heights of Madame Tussauds but can boast with it's fascinating fifteen or so skillfully sculpted dolls of Indian celebrities like Mahatma Ghandi (who has to the easiest historical character, bar Wallace from Wallace and Gromit, to recreate) and for some reason Jackie Chan and Saddam Hussein. After a few days in the small coastal town, we eventually managed to get out of there and catch a few buses and a train to get to Chennai (or Madras), however Chennai doesn't feel like the kind of place where you want to spend more than 1 day so we decided to jump train in Villapuram with the rest of the Swedish crew, were we could catch yet another bus to get to the former French colonial town of Pondecherry (or Puducherry). What we've seen of Pondecherry so far is nice, finding accommodation wasn't the easiest of tasks but eventually we got it right. We won't be staying here for long though and no matter how long we postpone our goodbyes we know it will very shortly have to be done as Joshua and I have to catch a train from Chennai to Calcutta (or Kolkata.. why can't they just stick with the names they've been given by their colonial overlords) on Tuesday morning. The journey will take 27 hours and it's funny to think that the distance we covered in over 2 months we will by Wednesday have covered more than in about 3 days!! The east coast has really been neglected but as I've said before you can always come back! I can finish by telling you that we have also just booked our tickets to Thailand (on Friday the 13th... how's that for pushing my luck), so by the end of the week I should have an Indian summary and start of a new chapter in this fantastic blog, read with great anticipation!

Thefts and Disease

Not the most joyous of titles I know, but this is India. This time I'm not the one to have been robbed, the unlucky guys this time were the two Jonas (nicknames Billy and Salle) and Daniel who woke up one morning to find that someone had snuck into their room and stolen: two mobile phones, one camera, one ipod and quite a few thousand rupees. Very annoying and it feels even more uncomfortable to know how professional these guys were managing to get with them the chargers for all electronics despite being in different cases and parts of the room. Anyway I went one of the guys to the police station, were we basically just waited and waited whilst identical officers in uniform (which i think includes a big black mustache) walked in circles around us until eventually (aka 3 hours) we got the ONE signature they needed and left. The morning after I managed to pick up my 39.6 degree fever again, which I have missed o so much, and it chose a great day to show up on Isabelle's birthday which Miriam and I had planned for quite some time. I'm not sure exactly how the day turned out as I was in bed for most of it, but I think it all went down very well. The surprise-day was spent poolside in a luxury hotel and then we had a nice dinner and drinks in the cocktail lounge, before settling in our Air conditioned rooms with thick duvets and television. It's strange the luxuries you can forget, just things you take for granted like warm water and electricity without power cuts feel topnotch when in India. The illness seems to have settled now but I know how devious he can be, so I'm taking it a tad more relaxed at the moment. Varkala otherwise is treating us well, relaxing on the beach, eating good food (most of the time) and beer or as they call it here "Pop Juice" served in teacups as the alcohol law in Kerala is quite strict (allthough the police know exactly what's going on and quite obviously take loads of money under the table.) Soon though I think we have to head over to another country which is sad as we haven't seen everything we want to see in India yet and also to say farewell to everyone, but you can always come back to India and practically everyone we've met are swedish so they won't be hard to keep in touch with either. More news when we know what's actually happening to us...

Houseboating

So just to make everyone calm from the start I can tell you all: my flipflops were successfully mended. The magical man was called Anthony, he was about 1 metre tall and worked in a shop the size of a shoebox. My shoes were fixed within a minute with some simple stitching and he refused to take my money until i forced it into his hand, so remember if you ever have troubles in Fort Cochin ask for Anthony he can mend anything from flipflops to broken hearts. We stayed in Cochin for a total of 5 nights before heading south to the small town of Alleppey by local bus. The local busrides here are no joke, the white dotted line down the middle of the road has no meaning in India and the whole trip quickly turns into a constant chicken race. We only stayed in Alleppey for 1 night and then went on a 24 hour houseboat cruise down the river and canal systems to the town of Kollam. The houseboats in Kerala are just amazing, incredible craftsmanship and the best accommodation we have found in India so far, allthough you can't help but feel like you are a white man during colonial times when you cruise between the palm trees sipping tea served by Indian men throughout. Apart from that feeling I would say it was one of the best experiences of my life, beautiful environment, great food, nice weather and all you can hear is birds and the silent motor humming. I don't think I can think of anytime in my life when I've been more relaxed and tranquil. I could have stayed on that boat for weeks on end, but "unfortunately" we reached our destination as planned and two local busrides and 4 hours later we arrived in the beach town of Varkala. I haven't had too much time to judge Varkala yet, but what I've seen so far I really like. The whole town is built high up by the cliffs and has a nice beach waiting below. It's nice to get back into beach-mode and as a difference from the beaches we've been on before the waves down here are actually quite strong which can be nice for a change. I'll see if I can manage to persuade Miriam and Isabelle to let me post some of their pictures on here soon even though they have a strict policy of not uploading any of their pictures on the internet. However my stomachs rumbling now and we're going to go get some dinner...

Cochin

So after two nights in Mangalore, in a hotel room full of bedbugs and mosquitoes, we have now been in the coastal town of Cochin in the state of Kerala for three days. The bus ride down took 11 hours but once again went very smoothly. Cochin (or as some call it Kochi) is a really nice town, about the size of Stockholm with a once vibrant but now rather dormant harbour. It has an interesting mix and history, with amongst others Portuguese, British and Dutch settlers, and also has a 2000 year old Jewish community melted in with the Catholic, Muslim, Hinduist and various other religious cultures. Vasco Da Gama died and was buried in this town (though later moved to Portugal) and Kerala is the first place in the world to elect a Communist government in a democratic election back in 1957, which quite obviously still rules to this day as you can’t walk many metres without seeing posters of Marx and Lenin or red flags with scythes and hammers swaying above your head, but enough of the history lesson. Our days here have been spent cruising between the two main islands on the cheap ferry, walking or rickshawing around the town looking at various sights, playing football (so far no cricket) with local kids and eating delicious cakes and doughnuts. Joshua has been unfortunate enough to pick up a nasty infection, oozing with pus in his knee and has been to the local hospital to get some anti-biotics which will hopefully help. Also we have met up with the three Swedes we met in Palolem, Jonas and Jonas from Dalarna and Daniel from Gothenburg, tagging along with them is the Essex lad James, how he copes with us 7 Swedes I don’t know. Anyway the 8 of us will probably head further south soon heading for backwater houseboats and more beaches as tans in India don’t seem to last very long in the cities. Sadly I can tell you all my trusty flip-flops have now broken and as the Indian market does not offer very comfortable slippers this could mean serious bad new for your brave author, however all hope is not lost as rumour has it an old man in Fort Cochin with a wooden shop can mend anything… We’ll just have to wait and see…

Mangalore

We (still the same four swedes) have now arrived in the small town of Mangalore (not to be confused with the bigger town of Bangalore) on the western coast still in the state of Karnataka, but first things first an update on Gokarna. Our stay in Gokarna (and really our whole time in India) can be described with one Hindi word: "Shanti", which means something like "relax" or "take it easy," I'm not too bothered what it really means as long as I can continue doing it. "Om Beach" in Gokarna was nice and quiet, empty at all times except for Saturdays and Sundays when Indian male tourists flock from all over the country to stare at western women bathing in bikinis, this has been the case on every beach so far but was made (if possible) even more obvious when a beach is so deserted at other times. It was nice to come back to the beach-life as our tans had already started fading after a week away from the coast. Gokarna town was also nice and very cute, it felt very Portuguese not to different from some neighborhoods in Maputo. So anyway back to the present, I'm happy to say that my illness has now almost completely vanished and I am now hopefully immune to all Indian bugs. Last evening we took the train for five hours down the coast, and arrived in the town of Mangalore. Mangalore is a lot bigger than what we have seen for the past month, and it feels like we have now left “Diet India/India Light” and have reentered the real world with just as many calories as it should contain. However Mangalore is much smaller and cleaner than for example Mumbai, and has some nice air-conditioned shopping malls which feel rather luxury after nothing but street shopping so far. We stay in Mangalore for one more night and tomorrow evening we take a sleeper bus to a new state and a new town, but more about that when we have arrived.

Sick As A Dog

All right who had their money on 29 days? In that case cash in, because that's how long it took me to get sick in India. I've had some minor hiccups prior to this but have now landed the full scale "Delhi Belly." I've been more or less knocked out with 39.5 degree fever for a few days now, going up and down all the time, crushing headache, pain in all limbs and also irregular visits to the very nice Indian lavatories (Nurse Niki what do these symptoms indicate?). I picked it up at some point during my "Rehab" in Hampi but still decided to make the 10 hour bus-journey (no bicycles yet) down to the coast again, this time to the small town of Gokarna. The bus-ride was not the most pleasant but not at all as bad as I had expected it to be. We were scammed at every possible point though as we were forced to buy additional trips to our allready fully paid ticket, but eventually arrived on "Om Beach" at around 5 o clock in the morning. As all guesthouses were closed when we arrived we decided to catch a few hours sleep on the beach. This seemed like a great idea until we woke up surrounded by cows who got a bit aggressive when they realised we had nothing to offer them apart from a few bananas, however things worked out fine and we are now staying at a really nice guesthouse right by the beach. I feel better now and hopefully it will stay that way but you never know with India, I'll write more when I can give a more detailed report on Gokarna.

Hampin Around

Our last nights in Palolem were nice, as the Goa tradition goes we bought fireworks and sent them off before we took the bus to Hampi (which is much further from the ocean than I ever thought I would get during this trip). The 10 hour busride wasn't too bad, allthough Josh and I had to share a narrow bed and I felt like a middleaged woman as my bodytemperature swung from boiling to freezing throughout the night. We've now been in the historic town of Hampi for a few nights, don't ask me what it's historic for though. It is extremely different from Goa here, very calm and quiet (almost like rehab as I have only had half a Kingfisher since arriving), not sure they've heard of the invention of the chair as every restaurant just has mattresses laid out on the floor which is cozy. We've rented bikes and also done some Rickshaw-sightseeing seeing the Hampi sights, watched the sunset from the top of the Hannuman temple, where we were attacked by the monkeys who basically run the place. The landscape in Hampi is absolutly breathtaking, at some point in my life I expect to see something and think "Wow, now I've seen everything" but every time I do something completly unique and different shows up. The small town is surround by mountainous piles of boulders in every direction as far as the eye can see, I wish I could upload some pictures, but (as my hilarious uncle clearly pointed out) this is unfortunately not possible due to lack of camera. I guess you could just Google (product placement) it and see what I'm talking about. The four of us will probably stay in Hampi for a few more days then head south again, rumours flourishing at the moment suggest that the next stage of the trip may be completed using two wheels in the form of a bicycle, I guess you'll just have read this space to find out...

Doh!

The inevitable has now happened; last night was the night of the Headphone Party which was actually quite good. We had quite a few beers and drinks before and suddenly the idea didn’t seem as mental. At the end of the night Josh and I had lost our key, so Josh stayed in the shack of three Swedish guys (Yeah we don’t hangout with anyone from outside of our home country, our guesthouse complex I think has about 80% Swedes now, and should soon be considered a colony) we’ve met, and I slept in the hammock outside our shack. I remember having my wallet and camera before falling asleep, and putting them on my porch, but when I awoke all that was left was my Swedish tobacco “snus.” The wallet didn’t have too much money in it and doesn't bother me whatsoever, however the camera had about 200 pictures taken which I don’t have any longer. And the most annoying part is that I had decided I was going to upload the pictures today as I have found an internet place with a fast connection. I guess I should be happy for the small things, like the fact that my “snus” isn’t gone and that miraculously I haven’t lost one pair of flipflops since Thailand. Also I’m going to take the wise advice I got from an Irishman I met (read following in an Irish accent to make it seem more genius) “I guess you’ll just have to use your eyes now then!” Otherwise things are still as fantastic in Palolem, soaking up the sun, watching football and we’ve even found a quiz-night. On Tuesday night Joshua, the two Swedish sisters (Miriam and Isabelle) and I are taking a bus inland for about 9 hours to the town of Hampi, which is supposed to have some nice temples and stuff, we’ll see how long we find that interesting and then probably head south to more beaches in Kerala.

Life in Autopilot

Since last not much has happened, still in Palolem and life is very easy at the moment. A bit of day time trekking to "Monkey Island" and nearby beaches which are paradise like and completely empty followed by beers and football at night. We usually eat breakfast and lunch at our guesthouse "Brendons" with some incredibly cute puppies and their not so cute mother called "Puppy-Moma." Palolem is a bit strange in one sense for being a beach with mostly young people, because they've put a silence curfew at midnight. Of course this doesn’t mean people go to sleep but has sparked a concept which I've never found before "headphone parties." Basically they give you exactly what it says on the tin, completely quiet parties with loads of idiots dancing to different songs. The headphone parties I've attended have had a choice of three channels in the headphones which you rent, two channels pumping the local "Goa Trance" and one offering something more relaxed like Barry White or Lionel Richie. On Saturday they’re having a big “Silent Noise” party on the beach with laser-shows and fireworks, so we’ve decided that we’re going to check it out and this time go all in and hopefully we'll all look like a bunch of real c*nts! Which should be nice!

Paulolem

We stayed in Anjuna for a total of three nights, it wasn't really our cup of tea (or whatever those guys drink to forget) Nothing wrong with it in general just a bit too hippie. We took a 2 hour long taxi ride south, and ended up in Palolem. Now we're talking, no families, not too many obnoxious Russians, a handful of friendly hippies but most of all a truly amazing beach, we've ended up in paradise. Palolem beach is located in a horseshoe formed bay, and on the beach they have allowed nothing but palm trees and bungalows on stilts. We're not ON the beach per say, but from our bed we are lulled to sleep by the waves crashing in on the beach. The shacks are very basic and sloppily built, with huge gaps between every floorboard and cracks in the plywood walls but it all adds too the charm, (just this morning we were woken by a cat who had managed to squeeze in under the door, but we like him as he keeps the rats away.) We've also met two sisters from Stockholm, Miriam and Isabelle, who as it turns out (of course, Sweden is too small) I have mutual friends with. We've spent our days so far with some mountain trekking in flip-flops looking for monkeys, which we actually managed to see and relaxing on the beach. Isn’t it ironic (more ironic then anything Alanis Morrisette mentions in her song) I go to Africa and swim in the Indian Ocean, but when I go to India I swim in the Arabian Sea… how queer! Josh and I also went on a "lake cruise" which was actually a swamp cruise, seeing loads of kingfishers (the bird not the beer) and herons and then we fished for crabs, catching some pretty big ones, all in the cruise went on for about 3 hours (basically we paid a man to do his job.) It was interesting but could have been about two hours and 45 minutes shorter. All in all though Palolem is great, and at the moment we have no plans on leaving. Who knows I might end up here for life… or a week.

It's Hippie Time

After writing last we eventually got to the delayed wedding reception, an amazing event at a big outdoor resort with small waterfalls and palm trees everywhere, I made a quick seatcount and estimated around 600 guests. Apart from the wedding we've been checking out what Baga Beach has to offer, it turns out they offer loads of Russians with too much money and white trash Brits with tattoos all over (I don't think I've seen one single British man without The Three Lions scarred into some part of his body) so we've mostly relaxed with beers on the beach. India has to main brands of beer, Kingfisher who's slogan is "The King Of Good Times" and Cobra who have counterattacked with "Why have a good time when you can have a great time." However we have opted for just having a good time as having a great time apparently means drinking sweet urine. Also Goa has its own special liquor called Feni, it also comes in two types; one made from Cashew nuts and one made from the sap of a coconutpalm-tree, drinking it straight was quite horrible but mixing it with the local Limca soda is actually quite nice. Of course we managed to see the fantastic football match on Sunday, when my team United thumped Joshua’s team Chelsea 3-0! After staying in Baga Beach for about six days we felt we needed a change of scenery, so yesterday morning we took a 20 minute taxi ride northwards to the close by beach of Anjuna. Anjuna is surprisingly different from Baga despite the short trip, more hippie backpackers, not as many families, dodgy electricity which can disappear for hours on end and also the beaches are not quite as nice as Baga, with cowpats every here and there and a more rocky kind of beach, but you can't have your cake and eat it I guess. We haven't decided how long we're staying yet, but will probably travel southwards sooner rather than later to check out new beaches, I'll write more when I have more information.

Going to Go to Goa

... Ok, I've allready arrived, but that pun of a title was way to clever and witty to leave out of this genius blog. I think I could probably get a job writing puns for "The Sun." The train ride from Mumbai down to Goa was very smooth, no delays no hassle just plain enjoyment, I say those British build one hell of a railway, God bless the queen! Goa is really nice, so far we've seen mostly the beach and bars located on the beach, but the old town is supposed to have some really nice colonial buildings from when this part of India was Portuguese. Last night we went to meet our mutual friend Sean, who has his roots in Goa. His cousin is getting married today so last night was some form of traditional rituals. It started with some fireworks from the balcony, then as it was a catholic occasion, we all stood up and recited "The Lord's Prayer" or as some call it "Our Father" I was stumped after those first two words, and stood silently trying not to draw attention by moving my lips slightly, after this everybody attending the party walked up, one by one and poured coconut-milk on the groom and his two best men (one of them being Sean.) Later on at the party I was sitting underneath the shrine of Jesus, when all of a sudden i felt my arm getting quite warm, as I was in conversation with a woman at the party I didn't want to be rude and interrupt, so I ignored it for a while, then realised the candle wax from the catholic shrine was pouring down my arm, the commotion that followed made me the local celebrity for the next few minutes, with people telling me how I had been blessed by the Lord, however this felt like it could only be punishment for not knowing his prayer. After this we went out for a nice dinner with Sean's family and then home for some sleep. As I said the wedding is today, Joshua and I aren't attending the actual ceremony but will be joining in for the reception afterwards, so I have to go home and get ready for that now, shit we should probably find a present, but what can one find in a tourist area like this, maybe they can start their new life with matching beachtowels or why not a beach-tennis set for the honeymoon... we'll see if we find anything more suiting...

Quick Bombay Update

After writing last time we went to The Leopold (where you can still see clear evidence of last months events, with bullet holes priding many of the walls and windows inside) for a few beers and and a bite. Beware of the Crispy Spicy Chicken if you ever visit, delicious but oh so spicy, and I think I found out this morning what Johnny Cash was singing about in "Ring Of Fire." Today we've just been buming about, took a walk on the beach, which was quite nice but the water is so poluted I feel sorry for whoever takes a swim there. Now we've just been to the movies, saw Madagaskar 2, I managed to get some sleep whilst watching it, which I never think is good review for a film. Also we've bought a train ticket to Goa. The train leaves late tomorrow night, and takes us to the beaches midday tuesday. I'm really looking forward to getting some tan, as the sun seems to have a hard time squeezing through the heavy smog. Now it's back out for a few more beers and I'll write more when I've arrived in Goa.

Mmmumbai

Our last night in Doha was allright, quite quiet we went to the old souqe which was interesting, ate some lamb liver and kidneys drank extremely sweet tea and smoked some apple flavoured waterpipe. The day after was rather grey, so we tried to kill the hours we had as best we could before flying to Mumbai. Allthough the plane arrived 45 minutes early we didn't arrive until around half past three in the morning. We found an airport "security guard" who told us there was no idea going into Colaba (The most popular area of Mumbai for tourists) so late at night and told us to take a taxi to a nearby hotel instead. We followed his advice and of course we had been had, but were to tired to care. The Hotel was almost the same price as the one in Qatar allthough the differences couldn't be more obvious, rotting walls, staff sleeping in the staircases, fair enough the small room had a colour T.V, but the only colour it could show was red! We tried to fall asleep but as the hotel was situated right next to a railroad crossing this became quite hard. Eventually we got some shut-eye and in the morning decided to make our way to Colaba by commuters train. A friendly local helped us find our way and even payed for our rickshaw as we didn't have any small change for the driver. We took a rickshaw to the train station and stood in queue for about thirty minutes to buy a ticket, meanwhile small children flocked around us nealing and touching our feet, begging for money, getting shooed of by other indians in the line. Finally we got our ticket and got on the train, it was jam packed with people, first we almost got onto the women's carriage, but finally squeezed into a men's wagon, it turned out to be first class allthough it couldn't have disguised itself any better. At the next station we were thrown off and had to run to another carriage, jumping on with our backpacks whilst the train had started moving. When the train stopped at Churchgate Station we took a taxi which took us to Colaba. Mumbai really has it's contrasts and coming here from a well off country like Qatar make the contrasts even stronger. Entire families sleep on the side of the highway, dogs run around everywhere, beggars are grabbing at you constantly and every now and then a cow shows up out of nowhere, all of this mixed with shantytowns and english colonial buildings which look to have been airlifted straight out of London. Since the terrorist attacks a month ago, security has apparently tightened up, armed guards walk the streets and metal detectors guard all the main tourist areas. After a lot of walking and haggling we found a room at the Hotel Regal Plaza (Sound fancy?.. it really isn't!) right down the road from the popular tourist hangout "The Leopold Cafe" (one of the main targets for the terrorists during last months attacks.) We had a nice Tikka Masala for lunch today and a few Kingfisher beers, which tasted amazingly good after spending two days in the dry city Doha. We haven't decided how long we're staying in the city before heading for the beaches of Goa south of Mumbai but I will write when I know more. Now I think it's time for some more Kingfishers, tata for now!

Happy New Qatar Year!

So me and Joshua arrived last evening in the capital of Qatar, Doha without any major mishaps, allthough Joshua's backpack went missing for an hour at the baggageclaim. We came to our hotel and to our surprise it was amazingly posh, our "suite" has two televisions one in the livingroom and one the dubble-bedroom, a bathroom with one showercabinet, one bathtub a toilet and of course the mandatory muslim bidet. We decided to start celebrating the new year by drinking some of the chinese rice-spirit I got from my cousin for Christmas, only to find that Allah had punished me for bringing alcohol to an Islam country, the bottle had leaked all over my clothes. The smell was quite putrid and the taste was if possibly even worse. We both had one sip, felt sick for 30 minutes and threw the rest away, Thanks Nina! After this I found a shirt and a pair of pants that didn't stink of booze and we went to see if we could find some place who would serve us alcohol. We found the pianobar at the Movenpick hotel. It was the equivalent of 450 SEK just to get in, and a beer inside cost us 100. We decided not to drink more than two beers and the complimentary glass of champagne and then waited impatiently for the clock to strike twelve. The atmosphere inside was quite sad, like a really boring cruise or a tragic weddingparty, but we stuck it out shook hands with a few people then went for a midnight walk instead. Doha is a very strange place, 80 % is a giant construction site, and the rest is fancy skyskrapers built in blue mirrored glass. Everybody drives a nice car wearing white pyjamas except for the "local" workers who are all imported from India, Pakistan or East Asia. Today we have been walking around for 3 hours looking for food, which proved much harder than it sounds, you really need a car to get around this town. We went in to the Musuem of Islamic Art which was quite interesting... just kidding it was very dull! Then we continued our hunt for food. Eventually we found "The City Center" which is huge mall with and iceskating rink and loads of fancy shops and of course KFC, which was to be our "exotic" lunch. Now we're going to take a cup of coffee and then take a taxi back to our hotel as walking around for three hours in flipflops was rather painful. Tonight we can hopefully find some local food at the Old Souq (Marketplace.) Next time I write I will hopefully be in Mumbai where we can hopefully drink some beer and eat something without spending a fortune.